“It’s a growing area of law,” Parker said of the “principled negotiating” introduced in the late 1980s by Stuart Webb. “The scope is very different between collaborative and litigated cases. … It (collaborative law) is useful and respectful resolution of conflict. We need more (of these) lawyers.”

Parker, who has conducted informational sessions for the public on collaborative law, said there are 300 collaboratively trained attorneys in Pennsylvania. She said a collaboratively lawyer will conduct training in Monroe County in March to add at least eight and perhaps 10 certified collaborative lawyers to the two already in the area.

Collaborative divorce means a more reasoned setting that steers children away from the emotional trauma of a combative tug-of-war in the traditional setting. As a result, studies show that children’s schoolwork and behavior is not as adversely affected in a collaborative divorce. Parker provided handouts for members of drawings by children showing the pain and frustration of the litigation process. In one, with stick figures of both parents saying in quote balloons, “It’s your fault” to the other, there are large letters next to them that says, “Please (with many underlines) just stop!”

A collaborative divorce process can bring in other professionals for perspective such as therapists and counselors as well as certified public accountants, certified financial planners and mental health experts.

A proper settlement is the goal from the outset. Two keys that she mentioned are transparency — a voluntary exchange of all relevant information — and interest-based negotiations that keep focus on common goals and common interests and needs, particularly those that would include other family members.

Although Parker said when asked by a Rotary member that 75 percent of her clients involved in divorce qualify for a collaborative divorce, those experiencing substance or domestic abuses in the marriage cannot take that approach.

She said a Uniform Collaborative Practices Act has gotten out of committee for the state Bar Association and through various necessary levels to reach the legislature for consideration. But she was skeptical about it being enacted any time soon.

During negotiating sessions, possible solutions to various problems are discussed, and mutually acceptable options are chosen. Conflict is reduced by the parties’ mutual commitment to the collaborative divorce process which requires the following:

• A ban on litigation or threats to litigate during the collaborative process;
• The disqualification of collaborative lawyers and team members from representation in court;
• The voluntary and complete disclosure of relevant financial information;
• The joint retention of mutual financial and counseling experts as collaborative team members;
• The use of the mediation model of good faith, interest-based negotiations

Collaborative divorce practice provides a unique alternative to expensive and time consuming litigation. It entails a unique settlement process that works within the legal system while keeping the parties out of the courtroom. Rather than relying upon court-imposed resolutions, it fosters an atmosphere of honesty, cooperation, integrity and professionalism within which the parties negotiate a settlement geared toward their future well-being.

Specially trained attorneys, neutral financial advisors and neutral communication or counseling experts assist couples to divorce with dignity and respect. Rather than depending upon the courtroom for solutions, the collaborative divorce team attends a series of meetings with their clients to settle the case in a calm, private and non-threatening environment.

Collaborative divorce is only one of many dispute resolution models available to divorcing couples. The best option will depend upon the facts, finances, goals and personalities involved. However, the collaborative divorce process does offer the following advantages:

1. The focus is solely on settlement;
2. It creates a less emotionally volatile atmosphere;
3. It contains more tools for resolving children’s issues;
4. It can lower the risk of making a bad deal;
5. It often results in a better quality deal; and
6. Legal fees are lower and more efficiently used.

Collaborative divorce practice is not appropriate for all cases and is not a perfect or foolproof system. However, it does offer a hopeful alternative to families facing legal disputes and conflicts who possess a desire to settle their differences out of court.

If you are contemplating or are already faced with divorce or other family law issues, I encourage you to learn about collaborative divorce. Please call me at (570) 424-0460 or email me at mlparker@legalchoicesllc.com. You may also reach me at Mary Louise Parker and Associates, LLC at 570-424-9100; the e-mail address is mlparker@mlparkerlaw.com. You will have a unique opportunity to meet with legal, financial and counseling professionals on the benefits of the collaborative approach to family legal issues and why it should be among the options that you consider.

I look forward to meeting with you to discuss this further.